Sorbet and granite

I really need to work on these, it's a great and easy way to make something tasty and fancy (my fave).

Proportions:

About 2-3 cups pureed fruit or fresh juices
1/4-1/2 cup sugar, depending on how sweet your fruits are and how big you want your crystals, more sugar equals bigger crystals
About 1-2 TB lemon or lime juice, or booze


You blend this all together and then put in the freezer in a long flatish pan, like a 9X13 and let it freeze for about an hour or so, then start scraping it up with a spoon. Scrape it up every hour or so.

Ideas:

black tea, green tea,  watermelon, lemon balm, strawberry, limoncello and raspberries

Not yo mama's stuffing

Certain brand name stuffings truly give it a bad name. We won't mention names but SOME stuffings made atop certain stoves is alright when it comes to flavor but truly crap when it comes to texture. Blech. I listened to some online guide which said that, surprisingly, this brand had actually fared the best in a blind taste test. Well they must not have had any feeling in their mouths that day, perhaps they were snockered on hot toddies or eggnog when that test happened.

Either way, I've discovered that stuffing is one thing that's not so much more difficult to prepare from scratch. It makes a world of difference.

Here's a good basic recipe for bready-not-soggy-sage-stuffing

Serves about 4 people (6 sides if you're being stingy, and trust me you won't want to be)

1 medium red onion, diced or minced

3 celery ribs, minced, leaves reserved and chopped

8 oz package sliced portobellini mushrooms

2 cloves garlic

4 TB butter

1 large crusty baguette or Italian hard loaf of some sort, cubed (about 6 cups)

1-2 TB chopped fresh sage (or if you wanna skimp use 1 1/2 tsp ground sage)

1 TB chopped thyme

2 tsp rosemary (?)

*

1/2 tsp paprika

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp pepper

1 cup chicken or preferably turkey stock

1. Saute onion, celery and garlic in butter for 10 minutes or so, till softened and beginning to brown almost. Add mushrooms after 5 minutes and stir vigorously.

2. Toss into a bowl filled with the bread, herbs and spices (also the celery leaves you saved) and then allow to cool for a few minutes before adding the stock.

3. Drizzle about 1 TB olive oil over the top and pop into a 350 degree, covered with foil. Remove the cover after about 25 minutes and bake an additional 10 minutes, till crispy and amazing.

Weird History Stuff

Ideas: from book of bad taste or romance blah from Kings of England.
Dating at the turn of the century...last century. Weird stuff that people did back in the day.
Kellogg and his silly masturbation stuff. Tales from the prairie, old timey people getting freaky. Or, alternately, how about list of silly sexual abstaining. Kellogg, weird cults from back in the day
Abstinence:
Kellogg and Graham: beginning of 20th century
betcha didn't know that your favorite cereal or cracker was originally created to deter folks from sex, or more specifically, masturbation.
Kellogg: was a staunch supporter of extreme abstinence and by that I mean he was also very much against masturbation.
Was a doctor of ??? ran a sanitarium that advocated holistic methods of healing, largely by the utilization of enemas--and lots of them. He also had some pretty legitimate theories about how things like a healthy diet can have a large effect on how one feels. But who cares about that. In addition to administering frequent enemas to patients, Kellogg would then have them eat a bunch of yogurt, using half their ration to administer yogurt enemas. Kellogg was very much against masturbation. He even made claims that masturbation was a direct cause of death. Graham and Kellogg both felt that a bland diet would help stave off those pesky sexual feelings and both recommended using their food creations as anti-lust snacks. Graham had the same point of view and suggested that people cut out as much fat, meat and of course seasonings as possible in order to curb sexual feelings. This is why he created the ubiquitous and well-known cracker. Little did he know that one day the ultra-sultry s'more would be invented, reducing his vision to crumbs.

Wacky anti-sex group # 2: late 1700's
The Shakers were descendants of the Quakers. Like the Quakers, they eschewed the fancy life, preferring to live plain and simply. Paradoxically, they had the wildest, most inhibition-free rituals of all Christian religions. They were called Shakers because they would go crazy during ritual, screaming gibberish, twitching and flailing about, reveling in mindless ecstasy. Possibly the most extreme of all abstinence advocates, the Shakers were not just against recreational sex but procreation itself, a large deviation from most religiously based abstinence ideals. They just didn't have sex...at all...never. Of course, masturbation was similarly reviled but I imagine that it was widely practiced anyhow.

Chix Pelau

CHICKEN PELAU------------
Marinade:
1/4 tsp: salt, pepper, cumin, ground thyme, oregano-2 cloves garlic, pressed
3 green onions, diced (use white bulbs and 1 inch of the light green top)
2 1/2 TB Pickapeppa sauce OR 2 tsp shoyu, 1-2 tsp ketchup, 1 tsp worshire, 1/2 tsp hot sauce

1 1/2 lb chicken, sliced into strip and punctured with knife

Mix marinade, coat chicken and let rest overnight (or at least 3 hours) while you soak beans

1 TB butter
1 m red onion
2 canned whole tomatoes, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1-2 carrots, sliced (also squash?)
1 c brown rice
1 1/2 cup water or broth
1/2 cup coconut milk

Saute onion and tomato in melted butter till softened, adding the galic (as usual) at the last few seconds. Remove to a plate, add oil and then brown sugar. Let caramelize until crystals are gone, about 3-5 minutes. Carefully add chicken slices, sear 4-5 minutes, flip and sear the other side for the same. Add the tomato mixture and then the liquids and carrots. Let boil before adding the rice, give a stir, cover and let simmer on low 30 minutes. Now you'll add your peas and let simmer for another 15-20 minutes, covered.


Add some tasty green seasoning if you are inclined, it ups the deliciousity by a lot.
Going green seasoning:
2 TB green onions greens (use the tops of the ones you chopped for your marinade)
1 TB fresh thyme, minced
1 TB oregano, minced
1 TB parsley
2 cloves garlic, pressed

Boating insurance

BoatInsurance.org (Anything Boat, Summer, Beach Related)

http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/outdoors/bal-sp.boatingdeaths23sep23,0,2155000.story

http://www.google.com/hostednews/canadianpress/article/ALeqM5gflMrL598yIuSAZk6a-ws5R67XEg

Why people don't head severe weather warnings:
http://www.sailmiami.com/magazine/boating_lifestyle/hurricane_preparedness_study.shtml

Recently there was a tsunami warning, stemming from the earthquakes that shook American Samoa, which strongly indicated that people should get the heck away from the beaches in LA.http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/09/officials-had-predicted-that-some-beaches-could-experience-higher-than-normal-tides-around-9-pm-in-the-los-angeles-area-th.html

Despite this advice, people still flocked to the beach--some out of apathy towards the warning, others to view the excitement for themselves. I also remember impishly refusing to head jelly-fish or rip-tide warnings when we wanted to boogie-board in Hawaii and sure weren't going to listen to some stupid sign. Why is it people do this? Why are we so inclined to think that we know best, certainly better than those so called "experts"? This seems at odd with the many psychological experiments which routinely suggest that the average person will do anything--even harm an innocent person--if a person in a lab coat tells them to do it.

Renter's Insurance************

Indian crappy copy paste stuff

Indian curry tonight!

Spice amounts to work with:

1. Rogan Josh spices:

4 cloves 2 black cardamoms 4 green cardamoms 1 blade of mace 2 bay leaves 1 tsp corriander powder 1 tsp ginger powder 1 tsp fennel powder 1/3 tsp turmeric 1 tsp paprika 2 tsp chilli powder (from whatever red chilli you like) 4 garlic cloves, chopped salt

2. Vindaloo spices:Whole red chillies. 8 cloves**1 tsp cumin seeds**3 inches of cinnamon stick**6 green caramon pods**1 tsp black peppercorns**4 tsp white poppy seeds

3. Dhansak:

• 1/2 teaspoon turmeric powder
• 3 teaspoon good quality dhansak masala (or curry powder)
• 1 teaspoon cumin powder**2 teaspoons coriander powder**2 teaspoon red chilli powder

4. Dopiaza:

chilli powder--bay leaves--cinnamon stick--some whole red chillies--1/2 tsp tumeric--1 tsp of cloves--1 tsp peppercorns--6 cardamoms--1 tsp garam masala powder--6 big garlic cloves, more if you've got tiddley ones-2 tablespoons ginger puree

Tofu spreads

Base

1 pkg Tofu (12 oz)

2-4 TB mayonnaise

1/4 c shredded carrots

3-4 green onions

2 cloves garlic, crushed

+soy sauce

+lemon juice

Various spices:

curried=dijon, turmeric, curry pwd

veggie spread=bell or hot peppers, celery, ?sunflower/sesame seeds?, turmeric....

tofu salad=pickle, dijon, lemon juice, capers, parsley (worcester??)

kung pao=sriracha/sambal, ginger, peanuts, (large slices onion, not minced, omit carrot)

paprika, curry powder

Blk bean burgers!

BLACK BEAN BURGERS

8 oz baby bella (1/2 chopped 1/2 blendered)
1 small red onion (or 1/2 med or large)
1/2 bell pepper (or small pepper or large hot pepper like poblano/anaheim omit hot sauce)
2 cloves garlic
1 sm. med. carrot
1 can black beans, rinsed and drained
1-2 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp turmeric
dash soy sauce and or salt
dash pepper
dash hot sauce
1 tsp worcestershire
1/2 cup plus 1/4 breadcrumbs
1. Throw onion, carrot, bell pepper, garlic in food processor or blender, blend till small chunks. Remove and do the same to 1/2 of the mushrooms, chop the rest. Heat some oil, cook mushrooms, onion, pepper,carrot and garlic 4-5 minutes, till water mostly evaporates and things look like a delicious burger mush. Add everything else except the breadcrumbs and stir like a madwoman.
2. Add beans, mashing constantly and cook down for quite a while, till far less watery and a good paste like consistency. This will take about 5 more minutes or so.
3. Transfer to a bowl and let cool. Add 1/2 cup of the breadcrumbs and then use a spatula (or whatever) to cut the mass of beantastic goodness first in half, then in fourths and finally cut these pieces into eighths. Form them into 8 thin patties which will be sure to cook adequately and dust with the remaining breadcrumbs.

Lean, green edamame "burgers"

1 c. edamame

Stir fried rice:
1 c (maybe a bit less depending on veggies) cooked brown minute rice (or day old brown rice)
1 poblano, minced
1 sm/med carrot, minced
2-3 garlic, minced
1 inch cube of ginger (opt)
dash fish sauce
2 tsp soy sauce

2 tsp lemon juice

dash sesame oil

4-5 green onions, minced

1 c. panko bread crumbs

1 egg

Just 1/2 cup plus 1/2 cup of the rice and edamame and panko made about 6-8 thin burgers (I think, I may have ended up using the full cup)

Prepare rice and let cool in the freezer for a while as you chop your veg and start stir frying them. Heat up a wok on medium, add 1 TB of oil, let it heat up for a few minutes, then add veggies till softened (2-4 minutes) finally add the rice and stir, adding all the remaining oils and juices and stirring till well combined. Heat for about 3 more minutes, continuing to stir. Add green onions last and let this cool before adding to cooked edamame in a blender and mixing well. Stir this together with the panko and an egg, mixing well.

Shape into thin patties and either saute for about 2 minutes on high medium or bake in a 350 oven until they get crispy and browned on the outside (ummm 10 minutes maybe?)

Paella

New Fun Thing to Try! Old School Paella Night

Paella--like so many other delicious foods we've become enamored of--began as mere peasant fare
Three basic steps:
1. Stock
2. Sofrito
3. Stock and rice are added

To save time, I will be using ready made chicken stock but one of these days I'll try it with the real deal, also maybe a seafood one!
Chicken and chorizo paella
4-6 servings

1 medium poblano (use two smallish-medium bells if you don't like it hot)
1 small bell pepper
1 small-medium red onion
1 stalk celery, minced plus any celery leaves attached, chopped
3-4 cloves garlic
3 med.large tomatoes

1/2 lb chicken (about 1 ish breast)
1-2 fatty chorizo link, sliced
4 cups of chicken stock (low sodium if possible)
pinch saffron
1 can peas, drained
(next time I might add a chipotle)
salt
pepper
chile powder
1 3/4 cup short grain rice (About 2 1/2 cups water for each cup of rice)
1 lime

1. Heat up the olive oil in a large soup pan/wok, add peppers, let sizzle for a minute, stirring. Add onions and garlic, stir till onions begin to brown and are translucent. Add celery and finally the tomatoes, let all this simmer until tomatoes begin to reduce to a paste almost, about 5-10 more minutes.

2. Meanwhile, brown the chorizo and chicken breast in a skillet. Heat till opaque and just a bit brown. Slice up chicken into bite sized morsels and add these to the wok. Stir at a simmer for about 5 minutes so flavors can accumulate.

3. Add the chicken stock, let it heat up a bit, about 2-3 minutes, add remaining spices and rice. Also celery leaves or parsley. The lime will be the very last thing to go in so don't go squeezing it just yet. Now you just give it a good stir and wait for a while. I like to use brown rice so this will take 45 minutes to be finished, regular arborio or basmati will take only 25-30. Now you let it simmer at a hearty level (not as low as a simmer or a high as a boil) for 15 minutes, check and stir and repeat this every 10 minutes until the rice is tender and the liquid has been absorbed into the rice.

Making crayons into colorful lip balm!

Moisturizing lip balm:

• pure cocoa butter sticks (you can find these at Walgreen's and are great to use as a hassle-free base)

• various colors of crayons (use 2 crayons for every stick of cocoa butter)

• little tubes or pots to put them in (I recommend saving old lip gloss pots and tubes for this very purpose)

1. Peel off the labels and break the crayons into pieces in a small, crappy saucepan that you bought at a thrift store for this very purpose (or just one you don't mind ruining).
2. Scoop the cocoa butter stick into the saucepan and heat on low, stirring occasionally, till melted and combined.
3. Let cool for a few minutes and then pour (using a funnel if necessary) into the small tubes, using a spoon to help scoop out the liquid balm.
You can also just combine these in a plastic bag using the recipe below

Straight da bomb gloss:

• 2-4 TB mineral oil (pssst it's just baby oil!)

• 1 crayon

• plastic bag

1. Combine ingredients in a plastic bag
2. Soak in warm water until things get melty
3. Microwave for 20-30 seconds and shake the bag to mix thoroughly
4. Snip off a small corner of the bag and squirt into containers to cool

Vegan ruby-red gloss: use beet juice instead of crayons (which are not vegan), and make sure to use cocoa butter or mineral oil instead of beeswax


Other items that can be used in home-made gloss:

• Petroleum jelly

• Beeswax

• Old loose glitter that you never use anymore to add some shimmer

You can buy tiny plastic tubes and gloss pots at most craft stores, and even some dollar stores! And pillboxes are a great way to store different colors of gloss.

Being better than hippies at festivals: grill marinades; enjoy your hotdogs, suckers!

Going grilling! New marinade recipes to follow. This weekend we are going to a music festival. So, as always, turning my nose up at plain ol' rubber hotdogs and pre-pattied burgers, I am going to create a lot of extra work for myself, as well as waaaayyyy more delicious food than my lazy homies.
We have some award winning beef brats from this rambly old guy at the Farmer's Market. This last time I thought he wasn't going to be as chatty, since I watched him simply bring some meats to the customers in front of us and let them on their way, but apparently Dustin and I are friendly and talkative looking and sure enough, he babbled for several minutes before he let us escape.
Also from the Market we have:
zucchini and summer squash
bell peppers
baby potatoes
corn

I aslo have a pound of chicken breasts in the freezer that I'm planning on making a marinade for and letting it thaw all night Friday so it'll be ready by Saturday for a tasty lunch.
So I'm going to make a marinade for the chicken and another for the veggies.
Veggies: just a simple olive oil/balsamic marinade
1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
3 TB balsamic vinagrette
2-3 cloves garlic
basil, savory, thyme

Chicken, hmm classic peanut marinade, or classic jerk marinade...tough one.
Peanut Marinade:
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/8-1/4 canola oil
3-4 TB creamy PB
1 TB miso
2 TB white wine, sake or even beer in a pinch
1/2 lime squeezed
3 clvoes garlic, pressed or minced very fine
3 slices ginger about 1/4 inch thick, minced

Mix and store in a snapple bottle to pour onto chicken once it thaws.

Or a somewhat more complicated Jerk recipe adapted from Epicurious

Cajun Chicken Burgers

Cajun Chicken burgers
Seasonings: 1/2- 1 tsp of each
blk pepper-paprika-garlic pwdr-onion pwdr-wt pepper-sea salt
fresh
1 TB fresh thyme
2 tsp oregano

TB (or so) spicy brown mustard
1/4 c green onions
1/4 c sweet peppers
several cloves garlic
some feta (to stuff inside)

Make burgers several hours ahead so all you need to do at the last minute is mushrooms and then cooking burgers while mushrooms finish up.

Lazy hungover Saturday stir-fry!

1 head of broccoli
1/4 lb green beans *
2 TB canola or peanut oil
2 tsp minced ginger
3 cloves garlic
Opt. 1 TB minced cayenne (or other chile)

Sauce:
2 TB hoisin sauce or teriyaki
1-2 tsp sesame oil (or sesame chili oil if you have it)
2 TB soy sauce
1 TB lemon or lime juice

Rinse and chop the broccoli into bite size pieces and cut the ends off the beans. Whisk together the sauce ingredients in a bowl and set aside. Heat wok over medium high heat till a drop of water sizzles and evaporates and then swirl in 1 TB of canola oil. Stir in the green beans and stir vigorously for 2-3 minutes, add broccoli and stir for 1-2 more minutes, adding a tsp of oil of necessary. Clear space in the middle, add the remaining oil and stir the ginger and garlic for 30-60 seconds. Add the sauce, bring to a simmer and cover, reducing heat to medium low. Cook till beans and broccoli are tender, about 8-10 minutes. Squeeze the lemon or lime over before serving. Pair with lemon-grass infused rice for an extra special meal.

Gettin' Botanical on Yo' Ass!

The botanical definitions of fruit and vegetables are often quite at odds with common parlance. For instance, almost all berries we consume are not, in fact, true berries! Many things that we consider "vegetables" are not only the technical fruit of the plant but actually berries!

Things that are berries: Gooseberry, black/red current, grape, tomato, eggplant, guava, kiwi, and pomegranate

Things that are not berries: Cranberry, blueberry, blackberry, raspberry, strawberry, mulberry, bosenberry, cherry

Interestingly, citrus fruits are actually a type of modified berry called hesperidium. They are just berries with a tough, leathery rind.

The point is, things that are berries, modified berries or thought of as berries are all incredibly good for you. Berries (whether true berries or fake berries I do not know) are considered a "superfood," and this is very much true. So eat lots of berries! They are high in antioxidants and packed with vitamins.

Technically the fruit of an edible plant is basically derived from the ripened ovary of the plant which results from the flower. Zucchini, avocado, cucumber, tomato, and peppers are all examples of foods referred to as vegetables which are actually fruits. Of course, if you're not a huge nerd like me, you probably care very little about this and you may resume incorrectly referring to avocados as vegetables and strawberries as berries. I certainly won't stop you.

Awesome surfin' sixties movie

For those who think young.

Get yourself a college girl.

Additions to Bad Movie Night

Spice World

Kazaam

Hobgoblins

Stop! Or my mom will shoot!

Starship Troopers 1 and 2

Caddyshack 2

Battlefield Earth

Ghosts of Mars

The hottie and the nottie (Paris Hilton strikes again!)

Step up 2: The Streets

Transformers (well the new one too but I'm talkin' bout the 80's cartoon movie)

Batman and Robin

Big Trouble in Little China

Escape from LA

Theodore Rex

Silver Bullet

Ginger Deadman

Foreign:

Cattive Ragazze

Adult:

Striptease (Do yourself a favor, read the book first, this way it goes from just plain bad to X ) bad!  

Showgirls

Pootietang

Manos: The hands of fate

Ax 'em

The People Under the Stairs!

Bubba Ho-tep

The Room

Vampire's Kiss

Bad Movie Night

Movies so bad they're good.

Best of all bad movies ever:

Troll 2

Cool as Ice

Page to screen gone horribly awry:

Alone in the Dark

Catwoman

Bad Modern Atrocities:

Gigli

I know who killed me

Bad Reputation

The Bad Girls of Valley High

Goofy 80's/ early 90's movies:

Breakin' 2 Electric Boogaloo

Rad

The Pirate Movie! (a Musical based on Pirates of Penzance) 

B-B-B B movies:

Cheerleader Ninjas

Plan 9 from Outerspace

Species 2 and (far worse) Species 3

Horror (kinda):

Frogs

Nine Lives 

Toybox

Black Christmas

Teeth

Ankle-biters

Toxic Avenger (many Troma movies are quite B-tastic and cult classics Trey Parker and Matt Stone used to be a part of Troma i.e. Cannibal The Musical)

Redneck Zombies (also Troma)

Summer drinks: gettin' crunk in the heat

Super Summer Gin and Tonics

It's a classic for a reason. I've always universally hated gin- that is- till I actually tried a well made gin and tonic recently. It blew my mind with it's deliciousness. And on the plus side, it'll help protect me from malaria! Woo quinine!

Fruity Fourth of July

1 oz (a shot glass full) of blueberries, frozen or popped into the freezer for several hours

3 oz gin

4 oz tonic

2-3 strawberries, sliced

1 strawberry, whole

Sugar

1 lime wedge

Cut a slit in the lime wedge and rub it around the edge of a highball glass. Pour the sugar on a plate and coat the moistened rim. Dump the frozen blueberries on the bottom of the glass, fill the next third of the glass with ice, then the gin, then the tonic and top with the sliced strawberries. Garnish with the whole strawberry.

Cooling Summer Spritzer

1/2 cucumber, sliced into rounds

10 oz gin or vodka
1 liter tonic water

2 sprigs of mint

Layer the cucumber, some ice and the mint in a pitcher. Pour in the gin and then the tonic, mixing gently. Makes roughly 3 largeish drinks. 

Lazy Summer Day Gin Slushie
1 pink lemonade frozen concentrate
1 limeade frozen concentrate
1  bag frozen strawberries
2 cups gin

Blend in blender, maybe with ice, if things get too soupy.

Udon Miso

Udon miso soup mmmmmmm
Base:
Several cups of water or dashi stock (see shiitake-kombu dashi stock)

Veg to cook:
1 carrot
a handful of mushrooms, sliced
1-2 chili peppers, sliced
a handful or two of edamame or tofu

Add last:
a few handfuls of spinach
a few gr. onions, sliced
2 TB miso

Heat up broth, simmer veggies until as soft as you would like (7-20 minutes depending on vegetable and how small you sliced them). IN another pot, cook the noodles according to package. Add spinach, green onions and so forth. Finally mix the miso with 1/2 cup of the broth you've been simmering and add to the soup. Add the noodles and let it sit on low heat for a few more minutes to heat through. Do not let it come back to a boil.

Dashi Stock:
Epi recipe:
for 6 cups water:
1 5 inch piece Kombu
2 5oz packages bonito flakes bring water to a boil w. kombu, remove after it boils, add bonito, take off heat, cover and let steep 3 minutes, strain and use!

Vegetarian:
Soak Kombu in water overnight, covered= 1 5 inch piece per 4 cups water, then bring to boil and remove kombu

for more pronounced, special mushroom flavor, toss in a couple shiitake for a few hours before boiling.
Sub porcini for shiitake if you don't like them!

Other mush:
4 cups to 4 shiitake, soak for 10 minutes, bring to a boil on medium heat, turn off heat and let sit 20 minutes then strain the broth. Use mushrooms for cooking.

Natural Spa

An easy way to save money in these tough times is to quit buying fancy-shmancy hair or body care products that you don't need. Some no nonsense soap and shampoo and conditioner are really all you need and if you use them sparingly, not every single day, you can save money on them (as well as the water bill) too.

Some particularly easy stuff to try:

Strawberry Teeth Whitener

Old fashioned hair rinses (for shine, body, etc)

Astringent

Hand care

Salt scrubs

Peel off fruit masks

Cellulite coffee salt scrub

Cucumber Facial Peel

1 small cucumber, peeled

1 small packet unflavored, sugarless gelatin

1/4 cup herbal tea (mint, chamomile)

1 TB aloe vera

Make the tea and let steep for 2-4 minutes, add gelatin, stir till dissolved. Grate the cucumber with a cheese grater into a bowl. Press the pulp through a mesh strainer and collect the juices. Mix the juices and the aloe into the tea/gelatin mixture.

Salt scrubs

Basic salt scrub mixture:

1/2 cup coarse sea salt

2 TB water

Salt glow:

1/2 cup salt

2 TB olive oil or grapeseed oil

Love scrub:

add 5 drops jasmine essential oil to Salt Glow

Happiness spice scrub:

add 3 drops chamomile or orange essential oil

1 tsp allspice

Relaxation Escape:

1 TB lavender flowers, minced fine (or 3 drops essential oil)

1 TB chamomile flowers, dried and crushed (or 3 drops essential oil)

****************************************************Kani Salad night!

kani salad: Work on shrimp avocado boats! Test soon to check proportions. 1 avocado* was tasty! 1/2 japanese cuke, julienned (check how much it turns out to be) actually a little more than half: 1 1/2 cup 1 carrot, julienned (MAYBE- yes! 1/2 small package fake krab sliced into strips the size of your julienned cukes (or real crab if you wanna be pretentious) 1 cup 1/4 cup Hellman's mayo 1-2 tsp lemon juice 2-3 tsp sesame oil 1 tsp sriracha 1 TB toasted sesame seeds and or furikaka

Mix together.

Tonight's dinner: kani salad and stir-fried rice ala Lyndsey!

1. Make rice, cut up veggies for fried rice, gather all sauces together around cooking area.

**Quinoa Salads and such**

Things I like:

Whole grain cous cous and quinoa as rice substitutes! Both are very quick, no fuss, and extremely delicious. It will usually say on the package but here's how you make cous cous. Heat water or stock to boiling, measure (see package) and pour atop cous cous, cover and let steam for 5 minutes. Fluff with a fork, mix with yummy things and you are done!

Quinoa is a little more tricky; some people recommend steaming it in a crazy complicated manner rather than boiling, but I feel boiling works just as well. Just don't put in too much water, about 2 times the amount of quinoa. Bring to a boil, cover and let steam. If there is any water left, strain it!

My favorite way to make quinoa is by sauteing a sweet pepper, a hot pepper, some onions or green onions, garlic and tomatoes (add these last, after softening peppers and onions) add the quinoa, some water and juice from the can of black beans that you will add at the very last minute. Heat to a boil, cover and let cook for 10 minutes, removing the lid for the last 5 minutes. Add the beans and you have yourself some delicious black beans and "rice".

2 c water - 1 c quinoa generally. 12-15 minute boil/steam

Quinoa salads:

Tabbouleh: parsley, green onions, mint, carrot, lemon juice, olive oil,

Curried shrimp and quinoa salad: ginger, green onion?, green chilies, garlic, turmeric, coriander, cumin, curry powder, black pepper, cinnamon,

(maybe coconut milk involved in the dressing) lemon, oil, herbs,

Cats, lobsters, and stir-fried rice

This is Apollo, my roommate's awesome cat, wearing his lion's mane halloween costume I made for him out of orange yarn. It was hilariously half-assed. Also note the delightful He-man and lobster pillows. Claaaaaassy

Stir-fried rice is one of my very favorite things. It's fairly easy and lends itself to infinite variations. This is basically the Chinese version of next-day meatloaf sandwiches. Some of the tastiest recipes are derived from other culture's ingenious leftover solutions! For this reason, cold, day old rice is generally best to use but I've found that boil in bag or other quick-fix brown rice makes things about 10 times easier.

There are Korean versions, Indonesian versions, Thai, and even Peruvian. These are all based off the numerous original Chinese recipes for fried rice. The idea is to finely mince some veggies so they cook quickly, minimizing exposure and saturation of oil. Then you splash on some oil and stir fry the rice. No fuss, no muss. My versions tend to be closer to Indonesian or Thai than Chinese in that my most necessary inclusions are garlic, green onion and soy or fish sauce.

The following things are necessary to a good fried rice: wet seasonings such as soy or fish sauce, sesame oil, and lime or lemon juice, then you'll absolutely need your aromatics like garlic and onions (red, white, or green) but you'll also need a few accessory veggies; my personal favorites are peppers (sweet and/or hot), carrots and sometimes even peas (not often though). Other things you can add include ginger, lemongrass, bamboo shoots, celery, zucchini, spinach/bok choy type things, etc.

Alternative sauces include hoisin, sambal oelek or other chili sauces, ponzu, really any thing that lends itself to other forms of stir fry will be welcome. And then there's the egg. I usually don't find it necessary to add the egg to my fried rice but some people love it. If you want, after you cook the veggies, move them to the outer rim of the pan, add a splash of oil and crack an egg in the middle, (on med. heat) then stir the egg briskly until cooked. Move to outer edges and continue.

Here's a basic, easy version that I cook often when I have bell peppers to use up

Lyndsey's Easy Fried Rice:

2 bags of Uncle Ben's Boil in Bag rice (they claim that each bag makes 2 cups but it so doesn't)

or 2 cups cooked rice (I'm partial to brown)

1-2 TB peanut, canola or vegetable oil (divided in half)

1/3-1/2 cup bell pepper, finely minced

1/2 cup carrots, finely minced

1/2 cup onions (red or white), finely minced

3 cloves garlic, minced

hearty dash of fish sauce (opt but yummy)

2 tsp- 1 TB of soy sauce (preferably low sodium)

1 tsp sesame oil

1/4-1 tsp sriracha (or 1-4 TB minced serrano, jalapeno or poblano)

4 green onions, minced (opt. but tasty)

1. Assemble ingredients, make rice, chop veggies and gather everything together beforehand.

2. Heat up 1/2 of the oil on high medium-high heat and swirl it around the wok. Once a drop of water sizzles, it's ready. Add the veggies (except garlic) and stir rapidly till softened.

3. Add the garlic and stir for 30-60 seconds. Lower the heat and add your soy sauce, fish sauce, sesame oil and cooking oil. Turn it back up to high med. and add the rice, stirring vigorously until begins to get crispy and everything is well mixed. Add further seasonings to taste (more soy or fish sauce, sesame oil, or hot sauce) and green onions.

Other types to try are Thai pineapple fried rice, Korean kimchi bokkeumbap, classic yang-zhou Cantonese Fried Rice, and Indonesian/Malay nasi goreng.

I have some chicken and zucchini

So I've got some chicken thighs, zucchini, mushrooms and green onions from the farmer's market (well and also from Hyvee but it's still early in the season, sue me!), furthermore, I have some bread crumbs and I looooooooovvvve stuffing. So I'm thinking a zucchini and mushroom and onion with breadcrumbs perhaps, and some additional stovetop stuffing! I know, I'm a bastard. For all my talk of slow cooking and disdain for the bastardization of food via quick lazy gross cooking "fixes", I do loves me some stuffing helpers. I'm not sure why I'm more willing to render tomatoes into pasta sauce rather than buy the jarred kind than make bread into stuffing but some things- like stuffing and mayo- are better bought pre-made. I guess I'm the hippo-iest hypocrite. 

Here's what I have:

1.2 lbs chicken thighs (boneless, skinless)

3 small zucchini

3 lg. green onions

A little more than 1/2 box of mushrooms 

2 lg cloves garlic

1/2 c Panko breadcrumbs 

Chicken broth (amount to be  determined)

Yellow bell pepper...hmmmm TBD

So most likely I will want to slice up my onions, garlic and mushrooms, julienne my zucchini, and then heat up my chicken broth. Saute the veggies about 3 minutes till browned. Add about 1/4-1/3 c chicken broth, add bread crumbs (maybe some stovetop). Squeeze a lemon and some olive oil on my chicken, rub with thyme and (maybe baby savory!) cumin, and salt. Arrange the stuffing in the middle of the pan, with the chicken encircling it securely. Bake at 350 for about 30 minutes, check and bake longer if necessary for chicken doneness. 

Well today is miserable. Hopefully I get a call soon about a seasonal and awesome job. Hancher is being relocated in various ways and Ashley knew someone in charge of it who was looking for people to help. Sadly she has a full crew currently but if some girl goes out of town, well that'd just be fabulous for me. It's not boring stuff either! Fortunately it would be moving drama costumes and the like so that'd be fun, though I'd probably be verrrry tempted to steal something or other.

I'm very worried about the weather and feel I may have jumped the gun in putting my peppers and tomatoes into the ground. All this cold rain can't be good for them. I also appear to have some sink holes on the garden, luckily it's only around the flowers but that still sucks 'cause I want a ton of goddamn flowers this year! Saturday night it's supposed to get down to the mid 30's so I'm going to have to put some old sheet down around the pep.s and tom.s, or maybe cardboard boxes, and bring in all the stuff I have in the pots. Later I'll type up an easy, cheap and lazy recipe that my boy roomie likes to cook. He likes tex-mex a lot.

**BBQ TIME!!!**

I can't believe the ignorant comments denying that carbs are the cause of many people being fat. Seriously, have you picked up the hundreds of well-researched books available on the topic? Someone who eats a 500 calorie piece of cake is going to be hungrier a LOT sooner than someone eating a 500 calorie piece of meat. Breads are empty calories that lead you to eat more and more. Were your ancestors fat? I doubt they ate white rice and white bread and cupcakes and cupcakes and french fries all day. They lived off the land and ate meat and vegetables.

Susie T. 

Commenting about an already stupid article, 'Dieter's Guide to BBQ survival."

http://food.yahoo.com/blog/hungrygirl/29417/dieter-s-guide-to-bbq-survival;_ylt=ArnxbJldmSZ6t_3OH4DaSmdmY.Y5

"The average person attending a Memorial Day BBQ will consume at least one beer, a hot dog, a burger, chips, coleslaw, potato salad and dessert," Dieter's survival guide claims. 

I say to that: gross, boring, and really, like who? I mean, I guess I'm mostly surprised by the banal types of food, I mean c'mon: a burger, hot dog, potato salad, chips AND dessert? And AT LEAST that much? They go on to note "two BBQ shockers!" The shockingly high fat foods they revealed to us were...badadadadadadadada: fried chicken and potato salad. Reeeeaaaalllly. I, for one, am shocked that something fried and something drowning in mayonnaise is high in fat or calories. That's just crazy talk. 

Where did all my posts go? Mr. Krinkles

Mr. Krinkles knew this moment might very well make or break his career. Haphazardly, he strapped on his helmet. He picked up his unicycle and confidently strode to the ring of death. The stench hung heavy in the air, blood splatters on the concrete shimmered like a beacon of false hope. Mr. Krinkles took his position. With determination he mounted the Iron Fury, his trusty unicycle. He glared across the ring at his opponent, Furious George. George paused a moment to pick some gnats out of a young fan's hair. Mr. Krinkles' simian eyes blazed with untapped rage. Mr. Krinkles felt his mouth grow dry, his muscles tightened in anticipation. The whistle blew and his furry feet pedaled furiously. Furious George came at him quicker than anticipated but Mr. Krinkles was agile and dodged his first attack.
Figure out your opponent, strike their weak link. Mr. Krinkles knew the rules of primacycling, but Furious George seemed undefeatable. George again moved in for the kill and Mr. Krinkles darted out of the way. Fans screamed on the sidelines, they knew this was the fight of the century. Would youth and stamina or age and wisdom prevail? In primacycling, the point of the game is to either wound your opponent with your knife helmet so that they can no longer stay on their unicycle, or force them out of the ring. Furious George went for bloodshed while Mr. Krinkles, more noble, preferred to force them out of the ring.
For several rounds this continued, the attack and avoid. Neither seemed to be gaining any ground, and neither seemed to be tiring out. Then it happened. As George attempted to slice into Mr. Krinkles, he misjudged and rolled out to the very edge of the ring. Mr. Krinkles, delighted, flew over to his side and attempted to crowd him out. George was precariously balanced, about to go over the edge when, in desperation, he began stabbing randomly in Mr. Krinkles' direction. The blade of the knife sliced across Mr. Krinkles' forearm. This one move was his undoing. Mr. Krinkles wheeled backward, howling in pain. George, now filled with blood lust, charged forward. He was aiming for the throat.
Mr. Krinkles was through playing around. Never before had he intentionally attempted to seriously injure another primate; this time it was personal. Head down, he charged Furious George. The two collided in a spectacular cacophony of fur and blood. George flew backward from his unicycle, loudly hitting the concrete. Mr. Krinkles, although wounded, managed to stay on his unicycle. A referee ran over and held his arm triumphantly in the air. Relief washed over Mr. Krinkles; he had defeated the young whirlwind. As he shouted his his final yell of triumph, the world grew dim, everyone around him swirled into darkness. 

My Mission Statement (kinda sorta)

Hah! Since I have such a hilariously shitty food blog (I reeeaallly need to get to work on getting some damn pictures taken of food I cook--jeez--is it really that hard?) that it's very fortuitous to have no one who actually reads this blog.

But, here we go. Let's talk about who I am and what I do. My name's Lyndsey and I grew up in Hawaii, Michigan, Iowa and California, which led to my varied culinary loves and styles. From hearty Midwestern comfort fare to taste explosions inspired by my Japanese and Hawaiian family members: Ono style. I favor bold spicy foods, and made-from-scratch, fresh from the garden cooking. I also love crafting and making all sorts of non-food items. 

I love cooking and tweaking recipes so they adhere to my standards of flavor and nutritional content. However, I also very much believe that food fear mongering and absolutes (i.e. miracle foods, outrageous health claims, this is so bad for you/this is so good for you, yada yada yada) are unhealthy and lead to significant culinary confusion amongst those not fortunate enough to have the time, money, or education/history to know how to cook, grow food, or balance a nutritious diet. 

I do not like fad diets, pseudoscientific claims, or detox/toxin language, but I DO believe in pharmacognosy where we study and utilize the power of plants in order to simplify our lives and get back to our roots, before technology complicated things and gave us all depression/anxiety. I do not idolize these concepts, it is just how I like to live my life, and if others are interested, great! I hate selling people stuff, so you won't see much advertising or bs fluff. I just aim to represent myself, my lifestyle, and my beliefs in good living, and self-love. 

I like to disrupt our capitalistic culture and obsession with money by creating as much as I am able, and minimizing my daily needs. I am lucky enough to live in a weird small college town where there is a predictable amount of waste during move out time. Perfectly good, clean (often brand new) furniture, electronics, books, school supplies, even unopened, fresh food stuffs, which I often pass around my community to folks who want it and don't care that it didn't come from the store.

I like to garden in a sustainable way that encourages foraging and allowing local prairie plants to take over. I strike a delicate balance between my vision and just letting weeds get out of hand. Speaking of weeds, I LOVE them! Some more than others, and especially the edible, local, and bee/butterfly attracting ones. 

My basic beliefs: grow your own food, and get as much as you can locally. Do some foraging, but be aware of where you are foraging! I don't gaf about organic, but if you want to do that, go for it. 

Buy as little as you absolutely have to. Have clothing swaps with friends, go to thrift stores. Don't be afraid to dumpster dive. 

Jerk Marinade and Sadness

Well, this year was round three in shittiest b-days ever. It was a little bit more good than bad--moreso than the others at least. Last year consisted of me and Dustin having 3 finals on my Monday birthday. Also, graduation was a few days after that, so that instead of celebrating my b-day on the weekend, I got to attend my b/f and friends' grad ceremony. Ya know the one I should have been in, but instead am never going to graduate because of MATH, yeah that one.

So I was incredibly depressed and had to force myself to appear happy for others, when deep down I was resenting every single one of them with a burning fury. Uggh. This year, no one is in town to celebrate with me as everyone has long since graduated and moved away, my b/f has a grown-up job now and it was his first 8-5 week, so he can't party with me, and the one friend I do have spent her time ignoring me and refusing to come out with me for the dance parties that surrounded my gloriously depressing day o' birth, aaaaand then left town for the weekend. Nice. Anyway, several days before that wretched, cursed day, I was able to have a pretty nice bbq and drinking sesh with a few friends. Here is what it entailed:

Veggies marinated in Newman's Italian dressing (thanks, Carolyn):

yellow squash

zucchini

mushrooms

bell peppers (red and green)

Meats:

chicken breasts in jerk marinade

Hyvee teriyaki marinated steak

Jerk Marinade:

3 green onions

3 cloves garlic

2-4 habeneros (I used 1 jalepeno and it was not even remotely spicy)

6 TB olive oil

1 whole lime, juiced

1/4 cup fresh minced thyme

1 tsp allspice

2 tsp dry mustard

1 tsp paprika

1 tsp chili powder

1 tsp cumin

salt and pepper

Opt. 1 mango, chopped up

Place green onions, garlic, habaneros, mango and spices into the blender, mix thoroughly and add lime juice and mix again, add olive oil in a thin, steady stream (or scrape onion, pepper mixture out of blender and whisk in the olive oil. Let chicken sit for about a half hour- an hour and then toss onto a hot grill.

I would like to note that I did not approve of marinating the veggies with italian dressing. Many hail the italian dressing marinade as an easy and delicious alternative to making their own marinade but like many "quick and easy" food stuffs, I find this both unecessarily lazy, and disgusting. I mean cum on, it's only tossing together some oil and acid and maybe a few spices. Honestly, I only allowed it because my friend was bringing over a bunch of veggies, and when she offered to bring the dressing, I felt it would be in poor taste to tell her that she disgusts me.

I'm actually kind of glad it happened because it'd been a while since I'd been forced to consume the hated marinade, and thus decided to give it a chance, especially since it was Newman dressing. I was sadly proved right, as so often happens; it was pretty gross and sort of ruined the vegetables for me.

***Somewhat authentic enchiladas (need tested and worked on)***

Real enchiladas!!

Sauce:

3-4 guajillo chiles, stemmed, deseeded and softened in boiling water for 12 minutes

1/2 cup chile water

2 cloves garlic

1 onion wedge (opt)

1 TB olive oil

*maybe 4 oz tomato sauce?

*also chix broth? 1 cup or so?

'Merican Enchiladas and quinoa and beans!

Update: I actually have many enchilada variations and will post more about them in the future. This is a bit dated, but still fun. If you really want to do it America style, just use a can of enchilada sauce (which I am--for the record--very much against) and then just saute up your ground beef with some onions if you want to be fancy, and some chili powder. Awwww yeah.


American Style Enchiladas:

Sauce:
1 small (6-10 oz) can jalapeno sauce (or two small cans diced green chilies)
12 oz can diced tomatoes
1/2 can tomato paste

Enchiladas:
1 small onion
2 cloves garlic
1 small zucchini (opt. but tasty!)
1/2 can tomato paste
1 lb beef
1-2 tsp mild or hot chili powder
1/2-1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp onion powder

1/4 tsp chile powder (ancho, chilacate etc.- or cayenne if nothing else is available)

1/2-1 cup monterey jack, cotija or even feta!
10 tortillas

1. Simmer sauce ingredients in a sauce pan for about 15-20 minutes, meanwhile saute onions in a large pan. After a few minutes add garlic and zucchini, stir around for two more minutes, add ground beef and spices. Cook on medium until beef is cooked through, about 4-5 minutes.

2. Roll tortillas around the beef filling and top with the sauce and then cheese.

Cook in 325 oven for 25-30 minutes.

Meanwhile, make your quinoa and beans:

1 small onion
2-3 cloves garlic
1 bell pepper
1 can black beans
1 cup quinoa
1 1/2 cup water

1. Saute onions, peppers and garlic for several minutes, till softened. Add quinoa and water. Heat to a boil and then cover, simmer for 12 minutes. Add beans and 1/2 cup of bean juices, cook till all water is absorbed. Garnish with feta cheese (opt.) and lime wedges.

Quinoa and Black Beans:
1 TB olive oil
1 small onion
2-3 cloves garlic
1 bell pepper
1 poblano
1 large carrot
1 teaspoon paprika
1/2 teaspoon cumin
1/4 teaspoon ancho or other chile powder (sub 1 teaspoon chili powder if so inclined)
1 TB soy sauce
2 TB olive oil
2 teaspoons lime juice (sub apple cider vinegar)
1 cup quinoa
2 cup water
1 can black beans

1. Slice veggies and pour quinoa and water into a small saucepan with lid. Heat on high, covered, till boiling. Reduce heat and simmer for 10-12 minutes before turning off the heat and letting sit till everything else is done.

2. Saute veggies in heated olive oil. Add spices, stirring for about 10-15 minutes, till onions and everything else is softened and starting to brown.

3. Quinoa should be ready, add drained black beans and mix thoroughly, add veggies and cover. Let sit on very low heat for about 4 minutes while you mix together the soy, olive oil and lime juice.

4. Turn off heat and mix in the dressing. Garnish with lime wedges and feta (if desired) add more soy, sriracha, fresh garlic or herbs of choice to taste! CIlantro, parsley, savory and lemon balm are good places to start.

I can't wait for summer

I need to update this more often, if only as a place holder, and nothing else. Bored at Audrey and Emma's father's house this morning--and waiting for a ride--I immersed myself in the only available magazines that interested me slightly: entertainment. The other choices were grim: Hawkeye Magazine, more sportsy crap, US weekly, and Golf Digest. I was enraged, and then amused, but more importantly I discovered some fabulous finds. Bruno is now going to be made into a movie! Hopefully better than the Da Ali G Show movie, more along the lines of Borat. But then I always did like Borat the best.

Also exciting is the August release of Final Destination 3-D. The only thing that could possibly top that is perhaps something literary, Victorian, and gory. Fortunately, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies might fit the bill. I am so very titillated about this book, I can barely see straight.

Dogma and spiritual fervor.

It's strange how fundamentalist beliefs like this form isn't it? People like to hold on to their certainty about a world view. So every world of he Bible must be true. EVERY WORD. Over the years the dogma just piles up. One piece of dogma is there to explain another and so on and so on. Then when people take these irrational ideas to their logical conclusions (the irony!) you end up with things that contradict themselves or you have ideas about morality that are just reprehensible.

All men are born into sin
which means everyone is destined for hell
but god is eternally merciful
so he sends his son to be punished in your place
so all you have to do is accept him and you'll go to heaven!
but if you're already born into sin anyway...
then what's the point in trying to be good?
you can rape your daughter and accept him later...
and everything turns out all the same!

Awesome person on SA: about Jack Chick, a terrible, terrible man

Irrational fears I have

I was just reading an amusing, "What is your irrational fear?" thread on my fave website and realized how many hilariously irrational fears I have.

The first and possibly most ridiculous is my pool shark fear. For some reason I cannot swim in pools alone because I am constantly concerned that giant blood-thirsty sharks will burst forth from the pool drains and consume me alive. It's strange since I love swimming in the ocean and don't worry at all about the sea creatures. I feel that ocean sharks are benevolent and peaceful. 

For some reason I consider this to be a perfectly rational fear but I am also terrified about the possibility of a zombie uprising. I believe this is due to my awesome father allowing me to watch Return of the Living Dead when I was like 10. Possibly younger. I can be around cemeteries in the daytime but at night- hells no. 

I have always had a needle phobia but, like the zombiephobia, I am also pretty sure this is a very rational fear. 

I am terrified of surgery and I just plain hate going to the doctors. 

I am sort of scared of heights, I am fine in airplanes but at any sort of ledge or cliff, even with a sturdy railing, I worry that my mind or body will malfunction and I'll just fling myself off. 

I have recurring dreams about tornados and my teeth falling out which apparently is more common than I thought. 

I am always worried I'll get hit by lightning during bad storms. I freak out if I'm outside. 

I am also often concerned someone is watching me from the street when I'm in my bedroom. 

Wow, so I guess I am a HUGE pussy. 

Chocolate and beating the blues

Sometimes we just feel like the most worthless hunk of flesh on the planet. Just about everyone seems to go a little wonky at this tentative no-longer-winter-but-not-quite-spring turning point in the seasonal wheel. Everything in our lives seems all wrong, we feel there is nothing to look forward to any longer, perhaps bad choices were made and we wonder how exactly we got on this go-nowhere road. Maybe it's just me.

Now I'm not a huge fan of sweets but times like these call for one thing and one thing only: chocolate! (Or, in my unusual case: alcohol, since I only crave sweet when I am majorly PMSing)

Right now I really dig dark chocolate as it's not as sickeningly sweet as regular packed chock-full of sugar milk-chocolate types. One brand in particular that is delicious is Green and Black's organic chocolate. There is quite a variety of amazingly delish treats to choose from, but my personal fave is the Maya Gold. Its name suggests exotic exploration, transporting you back into a more simple time, leading you to wonder what 21st century America would be like, had the majestic society not mysteriously vanished.

Super sensuous Bleu Cheese and Sesame Soy Balsamic

Hmmm, so that didn't seem to work, clearly there was supposed to be some stuff after that, "So this will be my first post," business. Apparently one cannot copy and paste from one's livejournal without it looking awful and being seemingly unfixable. That'll make this tricky. Let's try again!

Is there anything more luscious than blue cheese dressing? Maybe if said dressing is being utilized as a hot tub for some sexy, sassy buffalo wings and then licked sensuously off one's fingers. MMMMM. I've been on a blue cheese kick lately--maybe it's because I don't eat it very often--so when I do, it's basically orgasmic!

Also pictured: Nachos, and Buffalo Chicken Meat Balls

Miso Blue cheese:

1/4 c buttermilk*

1/2 cup mayonnaise

1/2 cup sour cream

2 tablespoon fresh lime or lemon juice

1 TB white miso

1-2 garlic clove, minced

1/4 tsp salt

1/8 tsp black pepper

2-3 oz crumbled blue cheese (or more, to taste!)

Optional 1-2 TB finely chopped fresh chives and 1/4 tsp Worcestershire sauce

Here's another great salad dressing: a zesty sesame soy balsamic

Sesame Soy Balsamic
1-2 cloves garlic
2 TB low sodium soy sauce
1/4 c. balsamic vinegar
2 TB mayonnaise
1/2 tsp. dijon mustard (opt.)

2 tsp. sesame oil
1/3 c. Peanut or canola oil


Whisk the garlic, soy sauce, vinegar, mayo, mustard and sesame oil together in a medium bowl. Slowly incorporate the peanut oil in a steady stream, whisking constantly.

*Often I just add 1 TB of lemon juice to 1 cup milk or coconut milk to make buttermilk, in the traditional lazy fashion.

"Award winning" chili

 Award winning Chili:

1 lb gr pork (dash worcestershire)
1 med onion
2 red bell pepper
1 large jalapeno or poblano

3-5 cloves garlic
1 cup stock
1 and 1/2 cans diced tomatoes (or diced up whole tomatoes)
1 8 oz can tomato sauce
4 oz red wine

1 chipotle or guajillo

drop 1:
1-2 tsp good mild pure chile powder
1 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp each garlic/onion powders
1/2 tsp cumin

drop 2: dash salt n pepper
1-2 tsp mild-med. chile flakes
1/2 tsp ancho chile powder
dash allspice

drop 3:
1/2 tsp cumin
1 tsp paprika
1/4 tsp cayenne if necessary
1 14 oz can black or red beans


Saute onions, peppers and garlic. Remove, brown pork, return veggies. Add tomatoes, sauce, stock and wine and simmer on low med, partially covered, for 20 minutes.
Add drop 1 and simmer for 20 more minutes.

Add drop 2 and simmer for 15-20 minutes.

Finally add drop 3 and simmer for 15 minutes.


Supposedly the drops are such that some stuff is in for longer and other stuff doesn't get overworked. It wasn't super necessary, but the chili was pretty delicious. I'm also not sure why I can't get this formatted correctly, dammit.